I've decided to go back to work. I am bored and I need to focus on something again. I have meetings this weeks to plan my courses for next year, so I'll be heading back in January. In the meantime I can revamp my teaching kit a little bit and get it all organised again.
I know some people might think it is a little soon to be teaching pregnant couples again but I think I'll be fine. I have seen pregnant women, I have held babies since Jamie died and it doesn't really matter that much cause they are not Jamie. It will be hard but I'll be caught out by something I can't prepare for, I'm sure it'll be a little thing that normally wouldn't affect me.
And I think I need to do it because if I don't go back to work, I may never do it. So I'm jumping back in with both feet. I don't want Jamie's death to be a negative thing, I don't want it to stop me doing the job I love. As long as I leave myself enough time to breath and get my head together I'm sure I'll be fine.
I know some people might think it is a little soon to be teaching pregnant couples again but I think I'll be fine. I have seen pregnant women, I have held babies since Jamie died and it doesn't really matter that much cause they are not Jamie. It will be hard but I'll be caught out by something I can't prepare for, I'm sure it'll be a little thing that normally wouldn't affect me.
And I think I need to do it because if I don't go back to work, I may never do it. So I'm jumping back in with both feet. I don't want Jamie's death to be a negative thing, I don't want it to stop me doing the job I love. As long as I leave myself enough time to breath and get my head together I'm sure I'll be fine.
posted by Mrs Smith at
Sunday, September 23, 2007
3 Comments:
Work was my anchor after I lost my twins. I don't know how I could have managed without the familiar structure, the meetings, the deadlines, all of which forced me to begin to deal with the world again.
Awww Janine - you're the only one who knows whether the time is right...
I think it's a positive move and one which ultimately will bring you peace.
If I'm half the ANT when I qualify that you are, I'll have done well...
xxx's
Janine, you are fantastic, you will know what is right for you.
Not only are you now able to give women the brilliant information you did on pregnancy you are now able to give them your unique perspective on the loss of a child. Something that we all think about in your classes but never dare voice. And even if that little something does get you, go with it, explain where it comes from, those in your classes, IMHO, will love you even more for it.
Hope to catch up soon. Hugs are needed!
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